Smiley: Try not to faint

By smiley anders

Before June gets away from us, here’s a wedding story from Gibbens Robichaux, of Thibodaux:

“I am retired now, but have played the organ for 400 weddings — and 1,500 funerals.

“At one wedding they had 25 bridesmaids. I was upstairs in the organ loft, and it took me 40 minutes to get them all in.

“In 1965, when I began my life as a cathedral organist, most weddings were at 10 a.m. on Saturdays.

“The bride and groom had to fast and drink only a little water. Many brides fainted.

“At one wedding a bridesmaid fainted on the altar. A groomsman came up, threw her over his shoulder and turned to the congregation, exposing her underwear.

“He brought her back in and later she passed out again, and he did the same thing.

“One time there was a 45-minute delay, with Father sitting at the altar while they went 15 miles to get the rings that someone forgot.”

Football flowers

Hewitt Gomez says, “Several recent columns had mention of ladies’ dress styles at LSU football games during the ’40s and ’50s.

“As yet, I have not seen any mention of their wearing corsages, featuring golden chrysanthemums.

“I bet Heroman’s Florist remembers, as they sold thousands of them. That is where I bought mine for my lady.”

Oh shut up, Joe

The juxtaposition of “football” and “flowers” reminds me of the time years ago when Joe Namath was in the broadcast booth at a Saints game and, during a lull in the action, started yakking about the fleur-de-lis on the Saints’ helmets.

He pointed out that the emblem represented a flower and wondered aloud about rough, tough football players wearing “flowers on their hats.”

Joe might have said more, but I muted the sound until I was sure he was through …

The Library revisited

After Jerry Berggren mentioned The Library, an off-campus cafe and pub frequented by LSU students in the ’60s and ’70s, we heard from Tammy Matzke, who says it was still around in the early ’90s:

“As a LSU law student it was a wonderful place to go after the grueling lectures (more like firing squads) of Litvinoff, Maraist, Hargrave, L’Enfant, etc.

“There was wonderfully cold beer and delicious fried food, which soothed the scathed soul of a law student.

“One thing I remember is that the cold beer was served in waxed paper cups with a floral design.”

She notes that Jerry mentioned getting out of class early to go to what his prof thought was the REAL library:

“I would also like to say to Mr. Berggren that no law student was allowed to leave class early for any library experience, whether it be Law Library, Middleton or The Library!”

Country biscuits

After mention of a Baton Rouge bank that handed out treats to customers’ dogs, we heard from Linda Hobgood:

“Clinton Bank & Trust (now Landmark) has been giving out doggie biscuits for years. Come to the country!”

Musical interlude

Bardie Roberts says the folks at Zeagler Music in Baton Rouge, who sponsored the Greater Baton Rouge Beginner Honor Band and its concert at Sherwood Middle School, thank the 33 schools and 164 music students who took part:

“There has been no honor band for beginners until now.

“All participating directors, along with host director Andy Pizzo, are to be congratulated for taking the time and effort to make this wonderful endeavor possible.”

Special People Dept.

Loose talk

Glen Falgoux, of St. Amant, tells of a sign he saw at a tire store, possibly to remind employees to be sure the tires were mounted securely:

“You Picked A Fine Time to Leave Me, Loose Wheel.”

Dangerous association

J.P. Morgan, of Geismar, tells of the guy who had a problem remembering names, and decided to use the word association method:

“One day he was introduced to a lady whose name was Mrs. Womack, and noticed she was a little thick around the waist.

“He thought, ‘Womack, Stomach, that’s close enough.’

“A few days later he met her again. He walked up to her and said, ‘Hello, Mrs. Belly.’”

Generation chasm

Here’s one to make you weep:

Denise Savoie says, “My husband and I felt like teenagers when we attended the Styx concert recently.

“My 17-year-old daughter Camille wasn’t sure if she had heard of the classic rock group, so I played one of their best-known hits for her.

“She said, ‘Oh yeah, I hear that song all the time in the grocery store!’ ”

Write Smiley at Smiley@the
advocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.