Smiley: Weird Names Dept.

By smiley anders

Our seminar on unusual business names and slogans is merrily rolling along, getting weirder by the day:

“Old Metry Girl” says, “An East Jefferson High School graduate has a company that puts up storm shutters and such. Name of his company? ‘SHUTTER UP.’

“And a local company selling counter tops has a logo on their trucks saying ‘Taking Formica For Granite.’ ”

Annette Daughdrill tells of a florist shop outside Mobile, Ala., called “The Petal Pusher.”

She adds, “The younger generation won’t understand why this was cute, but those of us who used to wear pedal-pusher pants will.”

L.P. Miller says he once saw this on the rear of the van of a company that made and installed window blinds:

“This truck is being driven by a blind man.”

Paul Schexnayder, of Lutcher, knows of a sports bar on U.S. 90 in Bay St. Louis, Miss., named “Third Base.” Under the name it says “The last stop before home.”

This is similar to bars in several places called “The Office” — as in “I’ll be staying late at The Office tonight, dear…”

Marsha Reichle likes the “He Ain’t Here” Lounge in Alexandria. “Shades of ‘Duffy’s Tavern,’ ” she says, referencing a great old radio show.

And Thomas Mixson tells of two memorable business names: Boxwell Bros. Mortuary in Amarillo, Texas and Goodbody Mortuary in San Diego, Calif.

Baby showered

Gayle Boudreaux, of Denham Springs, says, “Linda Irwin’s inquiry about locals who were once ‘Baby of the Week’ prompted my mother to search for mementos from 1952, when I was the lucky child chosen.

“Not only does she still have the framed portrait by Jan’s Photography, she also unearthed two 78 rpm recordings of WLCS Radio’s “Shower of Gifts” — which was in no way an exaggeration!

“Local businesses generously donated an abundance of prizes for my parents and myself, which must have been thrilling for our young family.

“In fact, I still have a tiny gold baby ring from Esnard Jewelers, as well as a sturdy little oak rocker, donated by Kornmeyer’s, which the radio host predicted would ‘probably last a few years…’

“Little did he know how right he was…”

Inquiring Minds Dept.

Is there some place that would be glad to get them?”

“The melody of the song lingers on, but the title has vanished. HELP!”

Special People Dept.

A nutty gag

“My family is noted for practical jokes,” says Morris Kansas, and gives this example:

“We remember John G. Cline (our father of two, stepdad of three) for, among other things, his fondness of a pecan tree that just decided to grow in the side yard.

“The pecans were tasty but very small; thus he had to endure numerous jokes.

“Then one fall day some nice large pecans appeared under the tree. He was confused.

“He didn’t buy the suggestion that the neighborhood squirrels were bringing them into the yard, did not buy the idea that maybe the large pecans were from the top of the tree.

“Spies spotted him on a ladder with a broom, swinging away to reach those big pecans at the top.

“A few days later walnuts appeared under the tree. Game over…”

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.