Smiley: Meaty topic

Here’s a story that made me laugh out loud and almost spill my Ovaltine:

Wayne Alch says, “Some years ago our son entered kindergarten, and after the first day we grilled him about his experiences.

“We asked him his teacher’s name, and he replied ‘Miss Weiner.’

“A few weeks later we attended a parent-teacher night. As we entered the classroom we said hello to Miss Weiner.

“She said we must be in the wrong classroom, as her name was Miss Eskemeyer.

“I guess advertising pays off!”

The famous few

After Mark Lazarre suggested that we feature famous alumni of area high schools (mentioning Steven Soderbergh of U-High), Chuck Falcon, of Donaldsonville, reminded us that James Carville, the political consultant, is an alumnus of Ascension Catholic High.

Phil Hannaman says Doris Smith is probably the most famous graduate of St. Gerard High, now Redemptorist.

She’s better known as Donna Douglas, Elly May Clampett of “The Beverly Hillbillies.”

And Chuck Willis, of Elizabethtown, Ky., admitting that “I’m shameless,” says, “How about Smiley Anders of Istrouma High? If that doesn’t get my name in print, I give up!”

Well, Chuck, you made it in print, but you forgot one of my classmates — a sturdy lad named Billy Cannon. …

The wrongest place

Mike Rodriguez, of Metairie, says tales of restroom mixups “reminds me of mine at the Beau Rivage Casino in Biloxi.”

When he and his wife visited there, he saw a sign saying “Men” and entered the room.

But when he heard “non-male footsteps” and “non-male voices” he knew he was in trouble:

“I bolted past one young lady, who gave a surprised, muffled scream. On my way out, there were two more females at a dressing table.

“I stated rather loudly, ‘One of us is in the wrong place,’ and received the response, ‘I wonder who?’

“Before leaving the casino I discovered the signs were misleading — at the hall entrance, ‘Men’ was on the right side and ‘Ladies’ on the left, but the entrance doors were the opposite.

“I voiced my complaint to the lady at the gift shop, but I have no idea if they changed the signs.”

Which reminds me

Tales of restrooms bring back the memory of my afternoon at McSorley’s Old Ale House, an ancient pub in Manhattan I visited in the early ’80s.

It dates back to the mid-19th Century, and up until 1970 was a men-only joint. Women were grudgingly admitted due to litigation, and years later even got their own restroom, But when I was there the only restroom, marked by a sign saying simply “Toilet,” was unisex.

The guy next to me at the bar, who seemed to be a regular, told me there hadn’t been any problem accommodating both sexes in the single space — evidently they had worked out the logistics.

On the road again

Richard Guidry, of Zachary, says one of his favorite car songs is “The Ballad of Thunder Road,” written by Robert Mitchum and Don Raye for Mitchum’s 1958 moonshiner movie “Thunder Road.”

Bruce Springsteen also performs a “Thunder Road,” but it’s a different song.

Thank-you note

Becky Robert says the Louisiana National Guard 1021st Engineer Company Family Readiness Group thanks all who took part in their “deployment farewell weekend.”

She says, “The barbecue hosted by the American Legion, VFW and community members was such a nice event, and the time spent with our soldiers was priceless.

“As we waved farewell to our soldiers, we were honored by some of the local fire departments, Acadian Ambulance and community members.

“Their presence and the beautiful flag overhead were genuine reminders of their support and made us proud!”

Special People Dept.

Louise Haynes celebrates her 99th birthday Wednesday. She is at Heritage Manor recuperating from surgery for a fractured hip.

Marie Turlich, of New Orleans, celebrated her 90th birthday Aug. 17 with Brocato’s Italian pastries provided by her family.

Lou and Jeffery Meaux, of Abbeville, celebrated 61 years of marriage Saturday.

Irene Callegan Gros and Calvin Gros Sr., of Morgan City, celebrated their 60th anniversary Aug. 9.

On the other hand …

Elonda Green says, “I was watching my grandchildren one day when Dayne, 4, pulled his sister’s hair.

“I told him that was wrong. I asked him if he knew the difference between right and wrong.

“He thought about it, then said, ‘No ma’am, but I DO know the difference between right and left!’ — holding up his right hand.”

Product placement

Jim McCormack says one of the regulars at the Patio Lounge pointed out that next to the LSU depth chart in our Aug. 20 football section is an ad for a bail bondsman.

He hopes it’s not an omen. …

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.