This little story from “Auntie” is dedicated to all of us who are either late risers or WISH we could be late risers:
“Poppa and Nannie were bringing 5-year-old granddaughter Addison Grace to school last week.
“Riding along, Addison kept yawning, so Nannie said, ‘You must be really tired, Addison, so maybe we should go to bed a little bit earlier tonight.’
“Addison said, ‘No, Nannie, that’s not the problem. Y’all wake me up too early in the morning; that’s why I’m tired!’
“I think she has the right idea!”
Cook that beast!
Dianne “Lady Di” Christopher, of New Roads, says, “Just saw the picture and story in The Advocate about the 18-foot oarfish found on the coast of California.
“It mentions several times that the scientists have no idea what to do with it.
“I can help them out there. The New Roads Harvest Festival coming up this weekend includes a ‘Wild Beast Feast.’
“Tell those guys to send us the fish and be quick about it. We’ve got the cleaning and frying crews standing by.”
Sarah Stravinska, of Chestnut, is perturbed:
“I am driving along when I hear a siren. My adrenaline spikes; I prepare to pull over but see no pulsing lights in my rearview mirror.
“It turns out the siren is coming from my radio. Some musician has incorporated a siren sound. …
“I hear my cellphone go off. As I scramble to answer it, I realize that the cellphone tone is part of a TV commercial.
“Worst of all are the times I have roared inside to answer the landline phone, only to realize that it is that dang mockingbird, which has learned to expertly imitate the ring!
“Us geezers have enough trouble hearing things. Give us a break!
“My husband says he can deal with the mockingbird if I really want that.”
Noting our tales of childhood marbles games, George Couvillon, of Marksville, says, “Memories of the dirt behind Presentation School take me back to some terminology we used in playing marbles.
“The shooting marble often was a large clay marble called a ‘boulette.’
“The order of shooting was determined by lagging.
“We arranged the marbles in a T-Carré, which is translated ‘small square,’ but is actually a triangle.
“A practice normally banned was ‘punching’ — moving the hand forward while shooting the marble with the thumb.”
Walt Dawson, of Patterson, and Paul Dykes point out that when Buddy Holden lost that fourth-grade spelling bee by spelling “choir” as “quire,” he was wrong only if he was given the definition of the word.
Because a quire is defined as “24 or 25 sheets of paper, the 20th part of a ream.”
So it is a legitimate word.
Talk that talk
Chuck Falcon, of Donaldsonville, says, “Tales of Justin Wilson remind me of the time I met him in New Orleans at a Saints playoff game.
“He was dressed just as you would see him on TV.
“I asked him if he really spoke in that Cajun accent.
“He replied, ‘Mais, jus’ a li’l bit.’ ”
Robert Collins says Saturday, Oct. 19, is the date of the 64th annual Downtown Kiwanis Pancake Festival at LSU’s Maravich Assembly Center from 6 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.
Special People Dept.
- On Thursday, Oct. 17, Neva Henderson, of Oakwood Assisted Living in Zachary, celebrates a very special occasion — her 107th birthday.
She was born in Hominy, Okla., a year before Oklahoma went from a territory to a state.
Elaine Browning celebrates her 94th birthday Thursday, Oct. 17.
On Thursday, Oct. 17, Ed and Willery Capron celebrate their 71st anniversary.
Ernesto and Maria Céspedes celebrate 67 years of marriage Thursday, Oct. 17.
Valerie and Gerald Medine celebrate their 54th anniversary Thursday, Oct. 17.
Rose Rolfsen says, “Your articles about phone sales reminded me of a friend of mine who was tired of getting calls about cleaning carpeting.
“So when the next call came, he asked if they could remove bloodstains.
“They said yes, they could.
“He said, ‘Oh, great — but please don’t tell anyone where you are going.’
“They hung up.”
No mule, no sale
Bo Bienvenu, of Prairieville, has a story that combines two of our recent seminar topics, telemarketers and mules:
“A dear departed friend told me of a tactic he said worked with telemarketers every time.
“He patiently listened to their pitches, then made his:
“ ‘I have a mule. He is old and swayback, and still pulls a straight plow, but he is slow.
“ ‘I need a younger mule so I can finish my chores faster, and I want to know if you would like to buy my mule.’
“After their refusal, he would say, ‘If you don’t want my mule then I don’t want your siding.’ ”
Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.